Friday, June 21, 2013

This mean so much to me

Assalamualaikum. Hi :)

Just had little conversation with my mama and that gave me a feeling that I can't deny. I miss them so much. It's not like I never been apart from them. I do have so. However, each time I go off, that feeling should come over and over again. 

Since my faculty's block is so so damn far away from everyone, my mama asked me to drive back her car at Terengganu and going back to KL.  I'm just okay with the fact that the block is too far since it's still in a walking distance. Just the route that I should take is scary and full of bushes. And I'm a girl. That's the fact! It's too dangerous for a girl to walk alone in that place. 

Actually, I should have been in bus, taking a trip to Terengganu at this moment. The problem that had just occurred is that there is no one can accompany me. Of course my mama wouldn't let me go, alone. 

Ho ha ho ha ho ha then come a decision from my ayah that is heartbreakingly real.

I do cry when my mama said that ayah took earlier plane to Kelantan and get into a bus to Terengganu tonight just to take that car and drive to KL alone tomorrow, which is the real situation is I'm the one who need that car, not him. And he just finished his don't-know-what-kursus at Johor today. I know, he's really tired and need to work again on Monday. I don't know why he did so much for me. I feel so cruel for letting him into a trouble because of me. For everything that you did for the past 15 years, I do really appreciate them. You do have your own problem, works, and need time for yourself but yet you did this for me. Thanks a lot, ayah :')

If people see how he treat me, they will say that he is really my real dad. Yes, he is my dad. I give all my love, care, respect and responsibilities as a child to her dad to him. I should. The reality is just unfair for me. And him. We're not really in a blood-relationship but just in a name. He is just my stepfather. But everything he did, took him into a very special place in my heart. He never been unfair to me, he do treat me the same as his own children, he never hesitate to give me money, to buy me something and he do proudly say to everyone that I'm his daughter. We're not really close but I do feel that I really have a very caring dad :)

Take care, ayah. Have a safe journey. Allah be with you. My doa will always be with you. 
Thank you...

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